How to Place New Employees in a Proper Department
Take the prospective employees you are trying to place and
put them in a room with only a table and two chairs. Leave
them alone for two hours, without any instruction. At the
end of that time, go back and see what they are doing.
If they have taken the table apart, put them in Engineering.
If they are counting the butts in the ashtray, assign them
to Finance.
If they are waving their arms and talking out loud, send
them to Consulting.
If they are talking to the chairs, Personnel is a good spot
for them.
If they are wearing green sunglasses and need a haircut,
Computer Information Systems is their niche.
If the room has a sweaty odor, perhaps they're destined for
the Help Desk.
If they mention what a good price we got for the table and
chairs, put them into Purchasing.
If they mention that hardwood furniture DOES NOT come from
rainforests, Public Relations would suit them well.
If they are writing up the experience, send them to the
Technical Documents team.
If they don't even look up when you enter the room, assign
them to Security.
If they try to tell you it's not as bad as it looks, send
them to Marketing.
If they are sleeping, they are Management material.
